Border Guard: You need a visa?
M: Yes
BG: Ok, you pay one of these
He pulls out a notebook that has two different prices sloppily written on it. The first is $20 + 100 THB. The second price is 900 THB.
I put $20 in my passport along with the visa application form and handed it to him.
BG: No, you need to give me 100 Baht as well.
M: No I don't.
BG: Yes you do.
M: The visa costs $20 only.
BG: $20 plus 100 Baht.
M: You have got to be kidding. Not 2 feet above your head nailed to the wall there is a professionally printed sign that says the visa costs $20. I was on the Cambodian government website last night. It said the visa costs $20. Now you pull out some scrap of paper that you have clearly written yourself and claim I need to pay more? Not a chance.
BG: Give me 100 Baht.
M: Why?
BG: For the Thai border guards.
M: Leave it out. I have left Thailand now. I owe them nothing. You are Cambodian, not Thai.
BG: Give me 100 Baht.
M: Here is $20 and my passport. That is all you need. Give me a visa. Now.
He throws a hissy fit. Thankfully there is nobody else trying to get a visa at the same time so he couldn't 'punish' me by making me wait. Instead he starts playing Candy Crush. I respond by standing 6 inches away from him and staring.
A few minutes later.
BG: What?
M: Visa.
BG: 100 Baht.
M: No.
BG: <stare>
M: <stare>
BG: <stare>
M: <stare>
BG: Ok.
Welcome to Cambodia.
After I was stamped in I was about to ride off when I was stopped by another guard. He runs off with my passport and driving license somewhere. I was starting to get worried when he turned up again.
Border Guard 2: Now go to customs
M: Customs? Since when does Cambodia have customs?
BG2: Just go there.
M: Where?
BG2: 500 metres on the left.
M: What? The 'customs' office is 500 metres away from the border post? 500 metres through the town?
BG2: Correct
M: Ok, whatever. I will be sure to go there. I definitely absolutely will not ride straight past without stopping.
Bike: Vvvrrroooommmm
And I had it easy. If I was travelling by bus I would have had to walk across the border along a separate path and run the gauntlet of touts waiting to 'help' me. As it was I was able to stay on the road and largely avoid the hassle. There is a special place in hell reserved for anyone who makes their money at an international border crossing.
So, an inauspicious start for Cambodia. Let's hope it gets better.
First thing to notice about Cambodia is the wealth. Compared to Thailand Cambodia is very poor and it is immediately obvious crossing the border. You are thrown straight into the chaos on the streets that really only occurs in less developed countries.
Also it should be noted that Thailand and Cambodia driver on opposite sides of the road. The cross over is a completely unmanaged 100m section of road in between the immigration buildings where everyone has to swap over at once. I might have slightly forgotten. Oops.
Then there is the people. I have never seen people with such huge smiles. You have to put in almost no effort to get this huge grin out of them.
And then there is the landscape. Flat. Very flat.
I went straight from the border to Siem Reap, the nearest town to Angkor.
I found a hotel that was recommended to me after a very long search (thanks Google.) When I arrived some bloke came up admiring the bike and helped find something to chuck under the stand to stop it collapsing into the soft sand. I thought he worked for the hotel but then a real employee turned up and hurried him away.
Angkor is the old Khmer capital. It was built over a period of several hundred years and then abandoned in the 15th century. It remained lost until the late 1800's when it was rediscovered and restored by the French.
Today the ruins are world famous, and it's easy to see why.
But first I had to get in. I decided to get a 3 day pass to allow some time to explore to massive complex. At the ticket office I bought a pass and then had to have it inspected by a nearby guard.
Angkor Guard: Oh, nice bike. Where you from?
M: England
AG: England? Wow, you ride all the way?
M: Yep, 35,000km or so.
AG: Wow. Well, just so you know it's ok to ride your bike today but not tomorrow.
M: Why not tomorrow?
AG: The tourist police will stop you.
M: Why won't they stop me today?
He gives the internationally understood gesture for eating.
AG: Lunch.
M: They're eating lunch?
AG: Correct.
M: But it's 10:30am.
AG: Right, so today is ok but tomorrow they will stop you.
M: Hang on, hang on. They're eating lunch now, and presumably they will be eating lunch for the rest of the day so they'll be too busy to stop me riding, right?
AG: Today yes, but tomorrow no.
M: They won't be eating lunch tomorrow?
AG: No.
M: I guess they're having so much lunch today they won't need any for the rest of the week.
AG: So tomorrow you will need to take a tuk tuk.
M: I think I can see where this is going now.
AG: It just so happens that tomorrow is my day off and I have a tuk tuk. I can drive you around.
M: What a happy coincidence. I dread to think what would have happened if we hadn't met this morning. I would have got myself arrested.
AG: Yeah, lucky for you. So just stop by here this evening when you leave and we will arrange somewhere to meet in the morning.
M: Yeah, not going to do that.
Needless to say there was absolutely no problem with riding round the complex at any time.
One of the things that you 'must' do it get up early to watch sunrise over Angkor Wat. I'm not exactly a morning person but I did actually manage it, and it was worth it.
This place is unbelievably massive. It covers something like 400 km2 with countless palaces and temples scattered all over.
But undoubtedly the best temple is Ta Promh. When Angkor was rediscovered everything was overgrown. Most place have been cleared out but Ta Promh has been left mostly as it was found.
Ok that's enough of that.
There is something else to do in Siem Reap.
If you know anything about Cambodian history then you must know about the Khmer Rouge and Pol Pot. The civil war, the following genocide and finally the occupation by Vietnamese forces resulted in Cambodia being the most mined country in the world. The clean up effort has been immense in recent years but millions of mines still remain and have a devastating impact of the people. While I was there 2 young boys were killed by a landmine while picking mushrooms.
Near Siem Reap is a landmine museum set up by a guy called Aki Ra. Aki Ra was a former child soldier in the Khmer Rouge, defected to the Vietnamese and now runs a mine clearing charity and home for children. A few years ago he was recognised by CNN for the work he does.
Just up the road was another temple which is part of the Angkor complex but away from the main bulk. Worth a look.
Except my pass had expired. The guy at the checkpoint was a good laugh and told me that since it was near the end of the day I could sneak around the back and he would look the other way. So I went for a little wander before coming back to the temple later on.
But then it was time to head back.
Oh right, there was a load of stalls next to the car park. And there were lots of children there. Urgh, I know what this means.
10 Billion Children: Buy a postcard
10BC: $1 dollar per postcard
10BC: Buy an elephant statue
10BC: Buy a drink
10BC: Buy a hat
10BC: Buy a shirt
10BC: Buy this thing
10BC: Give me money
M: Uhh, kind of just want to get to my bike now.
10BC: Buy a post card, 10 post cards for $10
10BC: Buy this
10BC: Buy that
M: Sorry, no.
10BC: Why?
10BC: Buy something
10BC: Buy postcards, 10 for $1
M: 10 for $1, that's quite a discount.
10BC: Buy this
10BC: Buy postcards.
M: Getting slightly old now.
10BC: Post cards, Post Cards, POST CAAAAARRRRRDDDDDSSSSSSSS.
M: No.
10BC: Why?
M: I don't want any post cards.
10BC: But wwwwwwhhhhhhhhhhyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyy?
M: I said no.
10BC: Post cards post cards post cards..........
10 minutes later
10BC: ........post cards post cards post cards
M: I'm sat on my bike, the engine is running, the answer is still no, and you are really pissing me off now. Get out of the way.
10BC: Go home.
M: That's what I am doing.
10BC: Where are you from?
M: England.
10BC: Go home to England.
10BC: And don't come back.
M: Lovely.
Yes, that did happen. It honestly is not made up or exaggerated in any way except for the number of children - it was more like 15 of them, not 10 billion. Believe it or not this isn't the first time I have been told to leave somewhere by this type of 'salesman'. In Essaouira, Morocco last year we were constantly followed around by people selling hash brownies. The answer was always no. But eventually one of them took exception to me. After the thousandth time of refusing to buy anything he told me to leave. He told me that this was his city and he was proud of it and that I wasn't welcome there. Says the drug dealer.
Back at the hotel I parked up when someone called me over. I didn't recognise him at first but it turned out to be the guy who helped me when I first arrive in Siem Reap, the guy who apparently didn't work at the hotel. We sat down for a drink and had a nice chat.
For a few minutes anyway. So he is a tuk tuk driver. You can probably guess the rest. I was treated to a heartbreaking tale of hardship and woe all about how he has 5 kids at home but he only works 2 days a month because it is the low season and doesn't have any money.
My arse.
First of all, it may be low season but there are still more tourists than locals in Siem Reap. And if it is true that he only works 2 days a month (which I'm sure it isn't) it is only because he spends all day hanging around in front of the hotel. And the reason he hangs around in front of the hotel is because if he only gets 1 fare every other day he will still get more money from tourists than if he was going round town finding locals to drive.
But his story might possibly have been more convincing if he hadn't delivered it over a mountain of empty beer cans with a joint hanging out of his mouth and a brand new iPhone in his hands.
The bit where I lost all respect for him was when he abandoned the sob story and went on the attack.
"But tell me, why would you come to Cambodia if you didn't want to help us?"
I was ready to hit him. I just don't know where to begin with that sentence. The arrogance and condescending emotional blackmail of the whole speech was staggering. And he didn't think there was anything wrong with it. To him it was just completely normal, like this is an acceptable way to treat people. The conversation came screeching to a halt and oddly enough he didn't want to have anything to do with me after that.
I met a German guy in the hotel and we were discussing the scams and dishonesty in Siem Reap and comparing it to Bangkok. I've already said the Cambodians are a very smiley people and that sort of helps to mitigate the nastiness of the behaviour. Almost like the smiles turn it into banter rather than aggression.
Until the next morning when I was leaving.
Cambodia uses a weird dual currency system thing. Their own money, the riel, is used only for small values. US dollars are used for anything larger. They get very funny about the condition of dollar notes, especially the higher value ones. They must be absolutely pristine, any marks or tears and it is next to worthless.
The only dollar notes I had left were $50s which are no good for most purposes, everything is so cheap. So I asked the guy who owns the hotel to change it to smaller notes. I put my $50 down on the counter and he produced 2 $20s and a $10.
And here is the scam. I glanced away for only a second but he managed to switch my brand new $50 note for one that had a tear in it. He grabbed the smaller notes back and said he couldn't accept damaged money.
This is a classic one. I think I'm usually quite good at detecting scams before they happen but I missed this one.
And it sealed my opinion of Siem Reap.
There is a lot of text there, I don't expect most people to finish reading it but if you have let me be absoutely clear about this.
The Angkor ruins are exactly as impressive as you imagine. It's one of those places where photos just don't do it justice.
But being a tourist in Siem Reap is a miserable experience. You very quickly learn that people are not to be trusted. I really hate to say this but excluding other tourists, out of the dozens and dozens of people I met in Siem Reap there are only 2 or 3 that I actually liked. There were plenty that I thought I liked for a few minutes before their true motives became apparent.
You realise that they have no respect for you as a person, you are simply a wallet and they will do anything to cheat you out of your money. They will show you only disdain and contempt disguised as friendship.
The stories above are only a few of the countless that come from Siem Reap. If you think I'm overreacting or have misrepresented anything then let me know. I would encourage you to go there and see for yourself but quite honestly I wouldn't wish Siem Reap on my worst enemy.
Ok, this one has turned very negative now so I'm going to cut it here. The next entry about the rest of Cambodia will be happier, I promise.
M: Yes
BG: Ok, you pay one of these
He pulls out a notebook that has two different prices sloppily written on it. The first is $20 + 100 THB. The second price is 900 THB.
I put $20 in my passport along with the visa application form and handed it to him.
BG: No, you need to give me 100 Baht as well.
M: No I don't.
BG: Yes you do.
M: The visa costs $20 only.
BG: $20 plus 100 Baht.
M: You have got to be kidding. Not 2 feet above your head nailed to the wall there is a professionally printed sign that says the visa costs $20. I was on the Cambodian government website last night. It said the visa costs $20. Now you pull out some scrap of paper that you have clearly written yourself and claim I need to pay more? Not a chance.
BG: Give me 100 Baht.
M: Why?
BG: For the Thai border guards.
M: Leave it out. I have left Thailand now. I owe them nothing. You are Cambodian, not Thai.
BG: Give me 100 Baht.
M: Here is $20 and my passport. That is all you need. Give me a visa. Now.
He throws a hissy fit. Thankfully there is nobody else trying to get a visa at the same time so he couldn't 'punish' me by making me wait. Instead he starts playing Candy Crush. I respond by standing 6 inches away from him and staring.
A few minutes later.
BG: What?
M: Visa.
BG: 100 Baht.
M: No.
BG: <stare>
M: <stare>
BG: <stare>
M: <stare>
BG: Ok.
Welcome to Cambodia.
After I was stamped in I was about to ride off when I was stopped by another guard. He runs off with my passport and driving license somewhere. I was starting to get worried when he turned up again.
Border Guard 2: Now go to customs
M: Customs? Since when does Cambodia have customs?
BG2: Just go there.
M: Where?
BG2: 500 metres on the left.
M: What? The 'customs' office is 500 metres away from the border post? 500 metres through the town?
BG2: Correct
M: Ok, whatever. I will be sure to go there. I definitely absolutely will not ride straight past without stopping.
Bike: Vvvrrroooommmm
And I had it easy. If I was travelling by bus I would have had to walk across the border along a separate path and run the gauntlet of touts waiting to 'help' me. As it was I was able to stay on the road and largely avoid the hassle. There is a special place in hell reserved for anyone who makes their money at an international border crossing.
So, an inauspicious start for Cambodia. Let's hope it gets better.
First thing to notice about Cambodia is the wealth. Compared to Thailand Cambodia is very poor and it is immediately obvious crossing the border. You are thrown straight into the chaos on the streets that really only occurs in less developed countries.
Also it should be noted that Thailand and Cambodia driver on opposite sides of the road. The cross over is a completely unmanaged 100m section of road in between the immigration buildings where everyone has to swap over at once. I might have slightly forgotten. Oops.
Then there is the people. I have never seen people with such huge smiles. You have to put in almost no effort to get this huge grin out of them.
And then there is the landscape. Flat. Very flat.
I went straight from the border to Siem Reap, the nearest town to Angkor.
I found a hotel that was recommended to me after a very long search (thanks Google.) When I arrived some bloke came up admiring the bike and helped find something to chuck under the stand to stop it collapsing into the soft sand. I thought he worked for the hotel but then a real employee turned up and hurried him away.
Angkor is the old Khmer capital. It was built over a period of several hundred years and then abandoned in the 15th century. It remained lost until the late 1800's when it was rediscovered and restored by the French.
Today the ruins are world famous, and it's easy to see why.
But first I had to get in. I decided to get a 3 day pass to allow some time to explore to massive complex. At the ticket office I bought a pass and then had to have it inspected by a nearby guard.
Angkor Guard: Oh, nice bike. Where you from?
M: England
AG: England? Wow, you ride all the way?
M: Yep, 35,000km or so.
AG: Wow. Well, just so you know it's ok to ride your bike today but not tomorrow.
M: Why not tomorrow?
AG: The tourist police will stop you.
M: Why won't they stop me today?
He gives the internationally understood gesture for eating.
AG: Lunch.
M: They're eating lunch?
AG: Correct.
M: But it's 10:30am.
AG: Right, so today is ok but tomorrow they will stop you.
M: Hang on, hang on. They're eating lunch now, and presumably they will be eating lunch for the rest of the day so they'll be too busy to stop me riding, right?
AG: Today yes, but tomorrow no.
M: They won't be eating lunch tomorrow?
AG: No.
M: I guess they're having so much lunch today they won't need any for the rest of the week.
AG: So tomorrow you will need to take a tuk tuk.
M: I think I can see where this is going now.
AG: It just so happens that tomorrow is my day off and I have a tuk tuk. I can drive you around.
M: What a happy coincidence. I dread to think what would have happened if we hadn't met this morning. I would have got myself arrested.
AG: Yeah, lucky for you. So just stop by here this evening when you leave and we will arrange somewhere to meet in the morning.
M: Yeah, not going to do that.
Needless to say there was absolutely no problem with riding round the complex at any time.
One of the things that you 'must' do it get up early to watch sunrise over Angkor Wat. I'm not exactly a morning person but I did actually manage it, and it was worth it.
This place is unbelievably massive. It covers something like 400 km2 with countless palaces and temples scattered all over.
But undoubtedly the best temple is Ta Promh. When Angkor was rediscovered everything was overgrown. Most place have been cleared out but Ta Promh has been left mostly as it was found.
Ok that's enough of that.
There is something else to do in Siem Reap.
If you know anything about Cambodian history then you must know about the Khmer Rouge and Pol Pot. The civil war, the following genocide and finally the occupation by Vietnamese forces resulted in Cambodia being the most mined country in the world. The clean up effort has been immense in recent years but millions of mines still remain and have a devastating impact of the people. While I was there 2 young boys were killed by a landmine while picking mushrooms.
Near Siem Reap is a landmine museum set up by a guy called Aki Ra. Aki Ra was a former child soldier in the Khmer Rouge, defected to the Vietnamese and now runs a mine clearing charity and home for children. A few years ago he was recognised by CNN for the work he does.
 |
| Infamous landmine sign |
Just up the road was another temple which is part of the Angkor complex but away from the main bulk. Worth a look.
Except my pass had expired. The guy at the checkpoint was a good laugh and told me that since it was near the end of the day I could sneak around the back and he would look the other way. So I went for a little wander before coming back to the temple later on.
But then it was time to head back.
Oh right, there was a load of stalls next to the car park. And there were lots of children there. Urgh, I know what this means.
10 Billion Children: Buy a postcard
10BC: $1 dollar per postcard
10BC: Buy an elephant statue
10BC: Buy a drink
10BC: Buy a hat
10BC: Buy a shirt
10BC: Buy this thing
10BC: Give me money
M: Uhh, kind of just want to get to my bike now.
10BC: Buy a post card, 10 post cards for $10
10BC: Buy this
10BC: Buy that
M: Sorry, no.
10BC: Why?
10BC: Buy something
10BC: Buy postcards, 10 for $1
M: 10 for $1, that's quite a discount.
10BC: Buy this
10BC: Buy postcards.
M: Getting slightly old now.
10BC: Post cards, Post Cards, POST CAAAAARRRRRDDDDDSSSSSSSS.
M: No.
10BC: Why?
M: I don't want any post cards.
10BC: But wwwwwwhhhhhhhhhhyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyy?
M: I said no.
10BC: Post cards post cards post cards..........
10 minutes later
10BC: ........post cards post cards post cards
M: I'm sat on my bike, the engine is running, the answer is still no, and you are really pissing me off now. Get out of the way.
10BC: Go home.
M: That's what I am doing.
10BC: Where are you from?
M: England.
10BC: Go home to England.
10BC: And don't come back.
M: Lovely.
Yes, that did happen. It honestly is not made up or exaggerated in any way except for the number of children - it was more like 15 of them, not 10 billion. Believe it or not this isn't the first time I have been told to leave somewhere by this type of 'salesman'. In Essaouira, Morocco last year we were constantly followed around by people selling hash brownies. The answer was always no. But eventually one of them took exception to me. After the thousandth time of refusing to buy anything he told me to leave. He told me that this was his city and he was proud of it and that I wasn't welcome there. Says the drug dealer.
Back at the hotel I parked up when someone called me over. I didn't recognise him at first but it turned out to be the guy who helped me when I first arrive in Siem Reap, the guy who apparently didn't work at the hotel. We sat down for a drink and had a nice chat.
For a few minutes anyway. So he is a tuk tuk driver. You can probably guess the rest. I was treated to a heartbreaking tale of hardship and woe all about how he has 5 kids at home but he only works 2 days a month because it is the low season and doesn't have any money.
My arse.
First of all, it may be low season but there are still more tourists than locals in Siem Reap. And if it is true that he only works 2 days a month (which I'm sure it isn't) it is only because he spends all day hanging around in front of the hotel. And the reason he hangs around in front of the hotel is because if he only gets 1 fare every other day he will still get more money from tourists than if he was going round town finding locals to drive.
But his story might possibly have been more convincing if he hadn't delivered it over a mountain of empty beer cans with a joint hanging out of his mouth and a brand new iPhone in his hands.
The bit where I lost all respect for him was when he abandoned the sob story and went on the attack.
"But tell me, why would you come to Cambodia if you didn't want to help us?"
I was ready to hit him. I just don't know where to begin with that sentence. The arrogance and condescending emotional blackmail of the whole speech was staggering. And he didn't think there was anything wrong with it. To him it was just completely normal, like this is an acceptable way to treat people. The conversation came screeching to a halt and oddly enough he didn't want to have anything to do with me after that.
I met a German guy in the hotel and we were discussing the scams and dishonesty in Siem Reap and comparing it to Bangkok. I've already said the Cambodians are a very smiley people and that sort of helps to mitigate the nastiness of the behaviour. Almost like the smiles turn it into banter rather than aggression.
Until the next morning when I was leaving.
Cambodia uses a weird dual currency system thing. Their own money, the riel, is used only for small values. US dollars are used for anything larger. They get very funny about the condition of dollar notes, especially the higher value ones. They must be absolutely pristine, any marks or tears and it is next to worthless.
The only dollar notes I had left were $50s which are no good for most purposes, everything is so cheap. So I asked the guy who owns the hotel to change it to smaller notes. I put my $50 down on the counter and he produced 2 $20s and a $10.
And here is the scam. I glanced away for only a second but he managed to switch my brand new $50 note for one that had a tear in it. He grabbed the smaller notes back and said he couldn't accept damaged money.
This is a classic one. I think I'm usually quite good at detecting scams before they happen but I missed this one.
And it sealed my opinion of Siem Reap.
There is a lot of text there, I don't expect most people to finish reading it but if you have let me be absoutely clear about this.
The Angkor ruins are exactly as impressive as you imagine. It's one of those places where photos just don't do it justice.
But being a tourist in Siem Reap is a miserable experience. You very quickly learn that people are not to be trusted. I really hate to say this but excluding other tourists, out of the dozens and dozens of people I met in Siem Reap there are only 2 or 3 that I actually liked. There were plenty that I thought I liked for a few minutes before their true motives became apparent.
You realise that they have no respect for you as a person, you are simply a wallet and they will do anything to cheat you out of your money. They will show you only disdain and contempt disguised as friendship.
The stories above are only a few of the countless that come from Siem Reap. If you think I'm overreacting or have misrepresented anything then let me know. I would encourage you to go there and see for yourself but quite honestly I wouldn't wish Siem Reap on my worst enemy.
Ok, this one has turned very negative now so I'm going to cut it here. The next entry about the rest of Cambodia will be happier, I promise.
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